a beautiful explanation to my concerns

Pages 120 and 121 of "He Restoreth My Soul" by Dr. Donald L. Hilton Jr. were Heaven sent. Shortly after I wrote my previous post I got to this part in the book. How grateful I am for his explanation of a sponsor and the need to have one.

In the ideal situation the wife becomes a partner in recovery and learns
to trust again as deceit is abandoned. Virtually all wives of those in
recovery who have shared their stories with me have described a desire
to know what is necessary, but not every detail. In other words, a man who struggles still with lustful thoughts may need someone to call
frequently. Burdening his loving but traumatized spouse with the
intimate details of his thought processes would be counterproductive and perhaps
even damaging. He would be much better served calling a sponsor he had met in
the addiction support group with such details. One wife told me her husband
might call and say. "I'm struggling today, pray for me." For her, this helped
her trust him, though she specifically said she didn't need to know the details
of exactly it was that was troubling him. This interplay of appropriate
transparency is sensitive and probably different for each couple. If he
relapsed or slipped, however, he would need to inform his wife, or trust would
not be able to grow. By doing so, she would be confident that there would be no significant secrets, and the husband would know that any
breach or relapse must be immediately reported, regardless of how painful to
both it may be.

Bold words were key phrases that stood out to me.

Seriously! This is exactly what I was trying to figure out from the whole sponsor thing! A sponsor won't take away our honest and open relationship, it would just be an added support to him and someone with whom he can share details of what exactly he's struggling with without it damaging the progress we've made. A wonderful woman from group asked me what would be okay with me. She said would you be fine with him just calling you and telling you he was having a hard time? I wanted to scream yes. All I want is to know when he's doing okay and when things are hard. I want to be able to send him a text message back encouraging him to hang in there, and that I love him no matter what his struggles are. Because I do. It's in that way that I want to be a support to him. I'd have to leave it up to him now if he feels like just being able to tell me he's struggling is enough, or if he needs a sponsor that can go into details with him about it. I don't know the extent of his struggles so he'd have to decide. How wonderful this book is to me, and how sweet is the Lord for giving me an answer so quickly through this.